It’s a strange feeling entering into a total life transformation knowingly. Most big changes or lessons in my life happened without any preparation. Without any idea they were even coming. While most weight-loss journeys are a choice, mine came to fruition over night when I got off a medication and saw immediate change that sparked a full mind and body transformation. Most of the deep losses I’ve experienced were also sudden. Grief that jolted new perspective. Even my move to California came from a random day in Boston that I just decided I was ready to go somewhere new. But this life changer I’ve waited years for. The surgery that stands between me and my pain-free life. Since getting an actual date for surgery my emotions have been everywhere. I’ve worked incredibly hard to get to the day where I can undergo this transformation. Preparation with braces, traveling to different surgeons, and before that a list of failed appliances and treatments. While it seems time to prepare would be a benefit, I’ve found it to be more of a challenge. As we all know, worrying about things out of control is a waste of time and energy. Obviously easier said than done. But on top of that there’s the line that separates what we can and can’t control. There has been A LOT of work involved in preparing for this surgery. 6 months with a mouth appliance to prepare my bite for a new jaw positioning, 3 months of braces to get to the wires suitable for surgery, planning travel to Dallas, finding a place to stay for an entire month after surgery when I need to remain nearby the hospital, amongst many other arrangements. It’s been almost impossible to distract myself from the impending and horrifying experience that is double jaw surgery with total joint replacement and the reality that my last chance at a pain-free life might soon be proven impossible. However difficult distracting myself may feel, it is definitely the successful method to getting through all of this. When I’m not actively working on plans for the big day, I am keeping myself busy. Focusing on doing all the things I soon won’t be able to do feels like a celebration. Every meal, every activity, every moment of freedom before months of recovery feels like a well earned accomplishment. However good these moments of joy feel now, they’re going to feel immensely more joyful soon. I’m celebrating all I’ve gone through to get to this moment and I’m celebrating this moment, coming around the corner, where I can truly begin to heal. Navigating my way through the years, then months, then weeks before this life changing event has been a journey on its own. Everything I’ve felt, pain, uncertainty, anxiety, worry, fear, is all a part of the human experience. I’m grateful to navigate these emotions and learn from them as I can always choose to do. With everything negative or unsettling I choose to rewrite a positive narrative. The surgery WILL be incredible. The life I’ve been longing for as long as I can remember is JUST around the corner. I love who I am now so I can love who I am through this next chapter. I’m just so unbelievably grateful for this wait to be over.
2 Comments
Randie Weisberg
11/7/2022 09:01:44 am
Wishing you the Best!!!
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Lindsay Greenberg
11/8/2022 05:53:38 am
Thank you!!!
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AuthorLindsay Greenberg, providing perspective on how to live a magical life. Archives
January 2024
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