Someone recently asked me, “How do you have so much to write about?” Weekly content of self-reflection comes easy when I’m searching. Everyday is filled with moments to be proud of, to learn from, to find deeper understanding in. Puzzle pieces of life to take away and find a place for. It’s what I enjoy. What brings me peace and connects me to my highest self. Writing encourages my spark, reminds me of my potential. How alive I can feel.
There is maturity in owning up to my ability to change things that can be changed. The work I put into my personal growth is something I am proud of. Each day I learn more and more about what it is I’m looking for out of life. Relationships, impacts I want to make, outcomes I hope to achieve. The more I know about myself, the better equipped I am to make decisions that fulfill an accomplished life.
I’m not one of those “doesn’t take life too seriously” kind of people. I’m deep. I like that I’m deep. I get a lot out of life being this way. I find meaning and I give meaning. However, lately I’ve been giving myself a break. Thinking less, flowing more. This balance is good for me.
While I do recommend every person try therapy as an outlet for whatever suits, I’m going through a phase where it brings more anxiety than solution. My blog requires me to soul search. Reach for answers, gather understanding, piece together a map that can guide me to an easier life. I take a lot of time out of my week to focus on what is therapeutic for me and apply it to my life. It seems when I had therapy marked on my calendar, it was cause for excessive reflection. Overthinking, paranoia, and honestly a headache of worrying about my own pain and suffering. What would be therapeutic to me, is to take time off from these concerns. To kick my feet up and relax. Focus my mind on anything but myself.
While I love how sharing my story makes a difference, I am brainstorming ways to give back that have nothing to do with me. Donating my time to a cause bigger than myself. Spending my energy for a day doing community service. Absent of personal worry. Not to teach myself a lesson or compare worse circumstances. Just simply to do good.
So, like everything else that’s good for me, I once again find balance to be my answer. Too much of anything can be unhealthy, even self-reflection. I vow to take time off. Give my mind a break. Understand that not everything I do or feel needs to be evaluated and let myself be. I take life seriously because I want to enjoy it fully. It’s time to give my mind a break, allow those moments of freedom and enjoy.